The Day of Love

Valentine’s Day is among us. It’s the day where couples show their love for each other. It has always made me sick. I don’t want flowers or a gift because society tells you too. Though, I would like something more than three text messages from you.

I have never been the lovey dovey type. Sure, I can be. I can be sweet and express my feelings in beautiful ways. It’s just hard for me to do. And today was made into such a big deal. You sat there telling me it was going to be an amazing day. Yet here I am spending it alone.

I get it, you have classes. I’m not mad about that. What I am mad about is cancelling my worship plans when you said you wanted to spend the evening together and then you bailing on me.

I just want to feel like I matter to you. Yes, you do an amazing job of showing me every day, but today I feel like an afterthought. Your mother has shown me more love today than you. Your mother is 1,000 miles away. You are a block away. This is kind of ridiculous.

I picked you out a card. I bought you a gift. I have spent the last two weeks wondering if what I got you would be good enough. And now I just wonder if you even remembered what today was until I texted you at 10:30.

I hate to be needy, but you set the standard. Maybe I’ll be surprised tonight. Maybe you have something magical planned. But I do know that I am hurt. That me cancelling the plans I was really looking forward to really sucks because now it’s just another night of me laying in bed watching Netflix. Another night of stuffing my face with junk and wishing I could be doing something else. And I could have been.

Happy Valentine’s Day to all. May your day be filled with you being called beautiful, pretty, and may someone, even just a friend, surprise you with flowers. Because you deserve it. Guys and girls alike deserve to be spoiled every once in a while.

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